Monday, May 14, 2012

Beyond The Lights 2012

This weekend was the 5th annual Beyond The Lights Celebrity Golf Challenge. Beyond The Lights was created by actors Kyle Chandler and Brad Leland to help raise awareness and funds for spinal cord injuries. The two organizations benefitting from Beyond The Lights are Gridiron Heroes and The Buoniconti Fund, which are both doing amazing things with people suffering from spinal cord injuries. This year, my son Josh and I signed up to volunteer at the golf tournament.

 After signing up, we got our schedule and job assignments about two weeks ago. Josh and I were going to be relievers on the course, which means that we relieve any volunteers for lunch, restroom breaks, what have you. We were assigned the first five holes and were pretty excited and relieved to have a set job to do.

 This year, with the event falling on Mother's Day weekend, we decided to make a weekend of it. We got a room at the Lost Pines Hyatt and Rick, Benji and Grace drove down later on Friday. Rick and I decided to go to the gala, so Friday ended up being a pretty busy day!

 Friday morning after we arrived, we had some breakfast, got our golf cart, and a map and away we went. We got lost just a little. There was no feasible way to stick just to our holes, so we ended up adopting four more holes, which actually made more sense in the long run. We got to see a Deer on the course. We got to see lots of folks that we had worked with last year. We got to talk to Kyle and Brad a good bit, but the highlight for me this year was meeting a few soldiers from Ft. Hood. These young men were detailed to sit on the course and watch the hole in ones. They were in their BDU's and looked so young and were so polite. It was a pleasure to be able to do even the littlest things to make them more comfortable. Josh and I kind of adopted them that day.

 So, basically, the whole day was spent driving around and relieving volunteers. I know it seems kind of boring, reading it here, but it was actually a really fun day and it went by pretty quickly. The weather, thankfully, turned out gorgeous. Up until Thursday night, they were calling for a 90% chance of rain with severe thunderstorms, so the sunshine and warm temps were more than welcome. The golfers all seemed in high spirits. We volunteers looked great in our navy and gold shirts. The folks in charge did a really great job making sure everyone had what they needed and it was just the most pleasant experience. Josh and I are already looking forward to next year's event.

 After we were done for the day, we went and checked into our room. I grabbed a quick shower, got changed and by the time I was dressed, Rick, Benji and Grace had arrived. Rick and I went down to the gala, had a drink before dinner and just visited with some folks. Unfortunately, I was a bit dehydrated and the drink I had went right to my head. By the time we went in for dinner, the room was spinning. The food was absolutely amazing. We shared a table with sme really nice folks. The live and silent auction both raised a good bit of money. Before I knew it, it was wrapping up and I was ready to go upstairs and just sleep.

 The next morning, we took a horse drawn carriage ride around the resort, played some horseshoes, explored and just relaxed. We had a wonderful lunch at the club house and then went swimming a bit. The resort has the most awesome pool and lazy river. It was just so nice to sit and relax. After a dinner in town, we came back, made some s'mores, watched a movie and that was it for the day.

 We came home yesterday. I'll have to say this was the most awesome Mother's Day I've had in ages. It was so nice just spending it with my family. I have the most awesome kids ever. Rick was amazing, setting it all up and driving down after a full day of work. I'm so grateful to him and so enjoyed just spending time with him this weekend. The resort itself was amazing. They went above and beyond with both Beyond The Lights and with our family's stay. The grounds are gorgeous and we got to see some really sweet animals, some horses, alpacas, and longhorns. And we made friends with this gentle giant named Hoss, who loves ice cream.

 A special shout out for Kyle Chandler and Brad Leland for concieving this event. They're both very busy actors, yet take time and energy out every year to do this event. I admire you both more than I can even say. The folks in charge, Heather, Karen, Gail, Jen, hopefully, I did'nt leave anyone out. These ladies were amazing. Everything went so smoothly and there was just this feeling of calm during the event. These ladies worked so hard during the year to create this amazing weekend and any time I saw any of these folks, they were just smiling and doing what needed done. I would have been pulling my hair out months ago during the planning stages. Kudos to y'all. It was a pleasure working for all of you. I'm going to leave y'all with a couple of video presentations that we watched during the gala, to give you an idea what this weekend is all about. So many people made this happen. My family and I are so blessed to be a part of it.
The Buoniconti Fund
 

Gridiron Heroes

Friday, March 23, 2012

March 24, 2003

It started out like a normal Monday. We were stationed in San Angelo texas and I remember the weather was gorgeous that spring. Lots of rain made for a spectacular display of our state flower, the bluebonnet. That morning was bright and gorgeous.

Josh and Benji, then 9 and 7 were excited that I finally was letting them walk to school with their friends for the first time. Little did they know that I was excited to not have to get their three year old sister, Grace out of bed quite so early.

I had just lied back down for a little snooze when the phone rang. It was a nurse from pediatrics. Benji had an MRI to see what was causing his siezures the Friday before and she was calling to let me know the results were in. She told me to NOT bring, Benji, but to bring my husband. As she said that, my heart started thudding in my chest and i felt sick inside. It couldn’t be good news at this point. I remember calling my husband at work and begging his coworkers to have him call back. It was an emergency. Ten minutes later, Rick came home to find me on the stairs, sobbing, while Grace sat with me, confused. We spent the next little while getting Grace to a friend’s house and driving to the clinic. After we got to the clinic, the nurse, without meeting our eyes, directed us to Dr Sawyer’s office.


The next ten minutes spent waiting for him were pure torture. When he finally came in with Ben’s records, he didn’t seem to know what to say. I remember asking him something, to which he answered, "We’ll talk." At that point, I asked why he couldn’t just tell us what was going on. Then he said the words that would change our lives forever. "Benji has a brain tumor." I remember looking over at Rick and he had the most PLEASANT look on his face. Almost as if Dr. Sawyer just told him it was going to rain. His expression just stayed the same. Dr Sawyer, then started saying words like cancer, surgery, astrocytoma, Cooks medical center. Words that made no sense and didn’t fit into OUR family. All I could think was "My God, this is how we’re going to lose him." We’re going to LOSE him. I had never heard of anyone survivng a brain tumor. I felt so sad that he would not get to do all those normal things. I worried about how Josh would take possibly losing his best friend. I wondered if Grace would remember the brother who called her goose and loved her so much. This is what it’s like to be told your child has cancer.

I called Glenmore and a secretary answered the phone. I blurted out the news and she put the school counselor on the phone immediately. We then went to the school and talked with her about the situation and how we would tell Benji his life as he knew it was over. Again, it struck me how utterly gorgeous the weather was that day. I didn’t want to tell him. I wanted him to have that innocence.It was like if I didn’t tell him, then it wasn’t real.

The rest of that day was a flurry of phone calls and appointments to get Benji ready for surgery. Opthamology, Neurology, neurosurgery, oncology. The list of appointments grew. We made arrangements for my mother in law to come care for Josh and Grace while we dealt with Benji. That evening we took the kids to the park. I sat and stared and prayed. I prayed almost constantly during that time. Nothing eloquent, just please God, let me keep him. . That day was a nightmare I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Everytime I woke up that night, it was just "Please God, Please God. over and over.

Benji’s school handled everything so graciously. His teacher and the school counselor told his first grade class and they all hugged a teddy bear to send with Benji. One of Benji’s teachers said that the counselor called a meeting with every teacher that had worked with the boys. this teacher said that everyone was devastated. I was devastated to hear this because I just wanted my child to be one of the gang, not the child with the brain tumor. The school raised three hundred dollars in two hours. This enabled us to pay for lodging while waiting to get into the Ronald McDonald house. Benji was actually able to go to school during this time between appointments.

One day was April Fools day. What I wouldn’t have given to be able to say April Fools. This is all a joke. We wore out a path between Angelo and Dallas. The Bluebonnets were spectactular that year, but i barely noticed.

His surgery was April Fourth and praise God, he’s been tumor free ever since. We live in San Antonio now. Benji is 16. The bluebonnets are out and they remind me of that sad time eight years ago when I thought I would lose my child.

Then I look over and I see Benji, with his fuzzy hair, freckles, and snarky little attitude and i don’t feel so sad anymore. I feel grateful that Benji is here with us and able to enjoy the bluebonnets with the rest of his family! Thank you, God!!!

Monday, March 5, 2012

A bitter sweet time of year....

As I sit here, enjoying a lovely spring day here in Texas, I can't help but think back to other springs in Texas. One spring day in particular, was especially beautiful. I spent a lot of time walking around outside on that day. It was gorgeous, clear and sunny, warm, with birds singing and the sound of kids outside playing. My boys picked some dandelions and were selling them to the neighbors. I was walking up and down the block, trying to coax my baby girl into making her debut. The next day, an equally beautiful day, our family welcomed Grace into our family. These perfect spring days make me smile when I think back to her birth.

Fast forward a few years. A different town in Texas. Equally beautiful weather. My boys were nine and seven. Grace was three and we had a whole week of spring break to enjoy. That year, I felt an almost urgent need to make spring break special. So we ate a lot of ice cream, had a lot of paydates and spent hours at the park, just playing and soaking up the Texas sunshine.
Spring break ended and within a few weeks, our lives changed forever.

Fast forward a week after spring break. A beautiful sunny Monday. My boys walked to school by themselves for the first time and I was just relaxing with Grace when the phone rang. Within a few hours, we had found out that my son, Benji, who was just in first grade, had a brain tumor.
Parts of that day are a blur. Parts of that day are forever etched in my memory. One moment that stands out in my mind is picking up the boys from school. We went outside and it was just gorgeous. I remember asking my husband how we could have gotten such bad news on such a beautiful day.

Thankfully, it's been nine years since that day, and Benji is still with us, whole and healthy.
Grace is now twelve years old and all three of my kids are looking forward to their spring break. Hopefully, they'll have gorgeous weather to relax in. I'm looking forward to having these days with my kids and making some awesome memories!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Here we go again. Sigh.....

So for the past several months, I've been dealing with cysts in my breasts. For the most part, these cysts have been harmless. In November, I ended up having a suspicious looking cyst biopsied. Thankfully, the biopsy showed no malignancy. The diagnosis was typical hyperplasia, which is good news. My doctor told me to follow up in May or sooner if there were any concerns.

Well, guess what? A month ago, I found two new lumps. I've gone through a full cycle to see if they'd shrink, go away, or grow. They've not shrunk, they're still there and the one feels slightly bigger than it did last month.

My dilemma is, I'm about almost totally sure these are more harmless cysts. I was tempted to just keep watching and go in May as scheduled. But these lumps are in my breast. So today I sucked it up and called for an appointment. And wouldn't you know it? For the first time EVER, I had a male operator when I called camo. What are the odds? So I'm going to see my PCM on January 23rd and we will go from there. Any and all prayers would certainly be appreciated. I guess it's better to go in and feel stupid, than to take a chance that there could be something bad. Thanks!!